Counseling

• Grief is a natural reaction to loss.
• Each student’s grief experience is unique.
• There are no “right” and “wrong” ways to grieve.
• Every death is unique and will be experienced by your students in different ways.
• The grieving process is influenced by a multitude of factors.
  1. The nature of the death
  2. The interpretation of the death
  3. The status of the relationship between the student and the person who died
  4. The emotional and developmental stages of students
  5. The communities view of the death
  6. Support systems available to students (family, church, school, etc.)
• Grieving never ends. It is a process and not something people “get over.”

Death from Chronic or Long Illness

• Issues often arise concerning one’s own health.
• Children may feel relieved that the person died because they are no longer in pain.
• Anticipatory grief may be experienced before the death. Grief will also occur after the death.
• Anticipation of the death allows friends and family to say goodbye.
• Long-term illnesses can be tiring and emotionally draining. Family members may be tearful, lack energy and have difficulty concentrating. Children may feel lonely and neglected since there is a lot of energy directed on caring for the dying person.
• Keep communication clear, open and frequent.

Preschoolers

• Need brief and simple explanations for their short attention span.
  

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School Age to 12 Years of age

• Need basic factual information.
• Begin to have biological, more rational understanding of death
• Concern over death of people they know
• Difficulty talking about feelings concerning death
• Predominate feelings: Guilt and Anger
• Develop facades of joking, unconcerned, etc.
• Short attention and tolerance spans in dealing with death

How to Help a Preteen:

• Spend time together
• Talk about the loss openly
• Address concerns of how this disrupts their life
• Provide structure and predictability
• Be prepared to deal with anger, encourage physical activities
• Respect the individual’s timetable
• Use creative methods to discuss the loss

Helpful Websites:

By clicking on a link below, you will be leaving the Conroe ISD website. If you use assistive technology and experience difficulty accessing the content on these webpages, please contact the counselor.

Kid’s Health – Helping Your Child Deal With Death

When Your Child’s Friend Dies

The 5 Stages of Grief & Loss

Helpful Books:

• Tear Soup by Pat Schwiebert and Chuck DeKlyen
• Lifetimes – The beautiful way to explain death to children by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingpen
• The Invisible String by Patrice Karst
• Grief is Like a Snowflake by Julia Cook
• Ragtail Remembers by Liz Duckworth